Safety on cruises, large vs. small ship cruising

QUESTION: A friend and I were going to take a cruise together, but she recently became concerned about the safety of it after hearing news of the death of the newlywed man and with the young girl coming forward to say she was raped by a crew member several years ago. I disagree with her and told her I would probably go on my own if she backs down. Do you think I am being unwise? I always considered cruise ships a safe way to travel. Am I wrong? — Jennifer S., Akron, Ohio

ANSWER: I would certainly support your going without her if you must, but I hope she will reconsider and accompany you on the cruise.

Yes, there was a recent death and, yes, it is true that a young girl also came forward to report that she had been sexually assaulted while on a cruise. The unfortunate fact is that people are killed and raped in most U.S. cities as well. Unfortunately, bad things do happen even in what we would consider a relatively safe environment. It just goes to reinforce the need to always take precautions so that you are less vulnerable.

When on vacation, on a cruise or visiting a faraway city, you need to be aware of the things you can do to keep yourself safe.

Probably the first and most important thing you can do is to not drink to the point of intoxication. The reports of the death of the newlywed husband appear to be related to heavy alcohol consumption. When you are intoxicated, you are much more vulnerable. The choices you make are not as good, your judgment is impaired and you are vulnerable to being taken advantage of in many ways. Just by not drinking excessively, you can significantly increase your safety.

Unfortunately, it is also important to remember that just because someone is a member of the crew of a ship or the staff of a hotel, it does not necessarily mean he or she is someone you can trust. Even at home, you would likely not go to an isolated location with someone you do not know pretty well. That same logic should apply when you are on a vacation. Yes, even if he or she is employed by the resort where you are staying or by the ship on which you are sailing and the person is wearing a uniform!

Having said that, and always encouraging good judgment and caution, I also still think a cruise ship is one of the safer ways to travel. There should at least be some screening of the employees, while it will vary greatly from company to company. Also, if a crime is reported immediately, it is a closed environment and there is a greater likelihood that the criminal will be apprehended.

I strongly support your decision to go on the cruise even if your friend decides to stay home, but let’s hope she will reconsider and not miss out on what could prove to be a wonderful vacation.

QUESTION: My son keeps trying to get me to take advantage of one of the deals on the big cruise ships, but I am hesitant. I have only been on the small, expedition-style ships and don’t know if a big ship would be too impersonal for someone traveling alone. I kind of figure that since I like the small ships so much, I probably wouldn’t like a big one. I keep telling my son he should come with me, but he is too busy. Do you think I should take the plunge, so to speak, and try one of these big ships? — Edith S., Wenatchee, WA

ANSWER: Your son is right; there are some wonderful cruise packages on the larger ships. I, too, love the smaller, expedition-style ships; they are truly wonderful. But, yes, I still think you should take the plunge!

Think of it this way. Even though you might have a favorite bed-and-breakfast in the English countryside that you love to visit, it does not mean you would not also enjoy a long weekend in London. It is true, however, that the experience would be very different. You likely would not go to London for peace and relaxation; you would probably go to see the shows, watch people and, as London is not necessarily known for its fine dining, visit many great pubs.

If you decide to try one of the larger ships, go with an open mind and realistic expectations. If size is a real concern of yours, start with one of the “smaller” big ships.

When you are deciding, don’t let a low price be your primary consideration. Talk with your travel agent or do research yourself online. There are truly lots of options in addition to many destinations.

You might want to join the Red Hat Society (431 S. Arcadia Ave., Fullerton, CA 92831; call 714/738-0001 [from 9 to 5 Pacific time, Monday-Friday] or visit www.redhatsociety.com) on a cruise. They are the ladies who actually wear red hats and whose motto is to greet middle age with verve and humor.

There are also many celebrity cruises where you can sail with a favorite singer, author or movie star or on which an orchestra will perform on the ship. Or try one of the many theme cruises, such as sailing with ballroom dancers. It likely will make it easier to meet other people who have interests similar to your own.

So don’t delay. Take the plunge and try something new and different!

—Tips for the Solo Traveler is written by Linda Ledray